loudening is alright Friday

I have to try and see what you're doing
just as starting every sentence
with a directive
These attempts are a weakness
The tired draggings up of tiredness
personified in falling asleep to dvd
eternity only to awake
To the inevitable menu
Looped like a child choking
On its way forever to purgatory
pulling treadmills with jump ropes
Three weeks at a time.   

At the Show Tonight

Begin one way and end another 
Way of hearing old names of loves
No longer out of the right ear

To make an exit seemed rehearsed
So many times in the back of your head
As leaving itself
Derives the most pleasure

The withdrawal so slow the stick
Of flesh cannot begin  
To repel the thoughts of receding
Ideas dropping all across the way home.   

fucking hawks

This will have to be a meditative winter,
Already I am too cautious and eager
For messages left here and there.
I walk to the door with trepidation,
The porch light burned out some time
Ago and this Fall rain brings power
Outages, better or too much sleeping,
More uses for those candles I found
On sale.  Shaving has become
A nuisance which has spawned other problems
Like figuring out new excuses for not answering
The phone.  Suddenly, I'm just a jerk.   

Getting fat with faintness 
That sinks and stinks right
Into the mattresses;   
Good God awful 
the walk it takes to get home
From a night out to the warehouse
To solo Havlicek highlights
in a Cough syrup summer
painted grey in Casino 
Brunch champagne
Followed Dad for Miles 
but it was on its way there 
The windows closed no one
Here tonight, here tomorrow.  

combinations